Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Things I've Learned from my Cat

     My cat has quite the personality.  He's my bratty diva, and he knows it.  I know not everyone is a cat person, but they should be.  After all, there's lots to be learned from cats.  I've compiled of list of life lessons my own little fur ball has taught me.

1.  If someone dangles something in front of your face, walk away.  That's right, you're too good for that "carrot before the horse" mentality.  Walk away with your head up, and once you've put some space between yourself and that arrogant asshole dangling the thing, turn around and attack their hand with all your strength.  That'll teach 'em.

2.  Don't let anything stand in your way. No, really.  If something is standing in your way, maul that sucker until it's an unrecognizable heap of shame…then play with it.

3.  If you want something, go for it.  I suggest by taking a running leap.

4.  If someone has the audacity to try to cage you, put up the world's biggest fight.  You're too full of life and potential to be held back by four walls.

5.  Let your feelings show.  That's right: happy, sad, manic, it's all good.  If you get urge to sing the song of your people at 3 am, go for it, and the neighbors be damned!

6.  You're not fat.  You have extra protection from disembowelment.  (Seriously, it's a thing.)

7.  If you claim something, that makes it yours.  Just make sure you hide it really well to make sure it remains yours.

8.  Take naps.  How else will you be able to party all night long?  Concerned about the neighbors?  See #5.

9.  If someone's not giving you the attention you deserve, demand it!  That's right, go full-diva.  Strut your stuff right in their face, and if that fails, lay down on their laptop.  That'll teach 'em!

10.  It's good to have a dog for a best friend.  Who else would you pin your bad gas on if not for the lovable mutt laying next to you?

     And since you sat through my randomness, regardless of your affiliation with cats, you deserve a banana split.  For breakfast.

Breakfast Banana Split (Greek Yogurt version)
Inspired by Pinterest

1 banana, split lengthwise
1/2 cup Greek yogurt
1 TBS honey, plus extra for drizzling  
Fruit of choice, diced (strawberries, raspberries, blackberries, blueberries, pineapples, etc)
1/4 cup old-fashioned oats

Mix yogurt and honey together.  In a separate bowl prop up two halves of the banana; dollop the yogurt mixture between them.  Top with fruit and oats.  Drizzle with extra honey as desired.  Enjoy!

Calories: 351
Fat:  1.5 grams
Carbs: 76.1 grams
Protein: 15 grams

Vitamin A: 2%
Vitamin C: 39%
Calcium: 18.9%
Iron: 7%

*These numbers are based off of the types of fruit I used, so if you decide to go with a different combination of toppings, your numbers will be a bit different.

Breakfast Banana Split (Cottage Cheese version)

1 banana, split lengthwise
1/2 cup cottage cheese
Fruit of choice, diced

Prop up two halves of banana in a bowl.  Dollop cottage cheese between the halves, and top with fruit(s) of choice.  Enjoy!

Calories: 229
Fat:  2.6 grams
Carbs: 42.3 grams
Protein: 11.3 grams

Vitamin A: 8.4%
Vitamin C: 44.9%
Calcium: 15.2%
Iron: 2.6%

*Same disclaimer as above.

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