Newsfeed Conservation Act

     I'm being a bit lazy today, so instead of a true blog post, I'm just going to jot down all the things I would post as Facebook statuses.  You should thank me really.  I refrain from sharing all my randomness throughout the day because it would fill up everyone's newsfeed and be totally annoying.  So instead I blog.  You're welcome.

Aundraya  (5 minutes ago) "Since Monkey will be appearing as a black cat in her upcoming dance recital, I thought it'd be fun to let her watch the musical 'Cats'.  Bad idea.  The only time she gets off of all fours is to stand up and shimmy as she sings 'Jellicle Cats'."

Aundraya (3 minutes ago)  "Okay so my little 'Jellicle cat' is starting to scare the mess out of my actual cat."

Aundraya  (1 hour ago)  "Did I give birth to a boy and just not notice?  I sent Monkey outside to water the plants, only to walk out a few minute laters to find her standing next to the tree with her skirt around her ankles, peeing.  That's not what I had in mind when I said to water the plants!"

Aundraya  (58 minutes ago)  "In other news, I may have my daughter teach me the art of peeing standing up, because I was pretty impressed with her aim."

Aundraya  (3 hours ago)  "So I kinda crashed a crawfish boil at my friend's apartment complex that was for residents only.  I don't care!  It was all in the pursuit of mudbugs!!!  (and in pursuit of the great company too, of course)"

Aundraya (Yesterday)  "Today Monkey and I are going to the "Over the Hump" party, which celebrates being halfway done with deployment. Unfortunately my child is walking around saying she's going to the "hump party".

Aundraya (Yesterday)  "I tried to explain to Monkey that it's the "Over the Hump" party, and she looked at me with the saddest eyes ever, and asked, "The hump party is over?!"...Smh moment."

Aundraya (Yesterday)  "It's getting hotter outside, which means I'm breaking out the summer dresses.  Unfortunately I forgot to break out the razor too.  :-/ "

  Now aren't you glad I actively participate in the Newsfeed Conservation Act?  No, that's not really a thing.  I just wanted a cool title for this blog post.  I'm actually just trying to take a brain break before I get back to studying.  Only 2 1/2 weeks of this semester left!  Oh, and before I go, here's a recipe for you:

Strawberry Jam
This recipe comes from the Ball Blue Book Guide to Preserving and yields about 4 pints.

2 quarts strawberries
6 cups sugar

Wash strawberries; drain.  Remove stems.  Crush strawberries one layer at a time.  Combine strawberries and sugar in a large sauce pot.  Slowly bring to a boil, stirring until sugar dissolves.  Cook rapidly to gelling point. 

*To test for gelling point, dip a cool, metal spoon into the boiling jelly.  Lift out a spoonful of the mixture; moving the spoon away from the steam.  Tip the spoon over a dish so the juice will drop off.  When the jelly mixture first begins to boil, the drops will be light and syrupy.  After continued boiling, the drops will become larger and will drop off the spoon in a sheet or flake.  The gelling point has been reached when the jelly sheets off the spoon.*

As mixture thickens, stir frequently to prevent sticking.  Remove from heat.  Skim foam if necessary. Ladle hot jam into hot jars, leaving 1/4 inch headspace.  Adjust two-piece lid.  Process 15 minutes in a boiling water-bath canner.

I'm Never Running Again

     I am never running again!  Nope.  That's it.  I'm done.  100% complete.  No mas.  And this is why:  You know those people who tell you once you've faced your fear, you can accomplish anything?  They lied!  Tonight I faced my fear.  I looked him straight in his scaly little face, and I ran in the other direction.  Literally.  I hauled butt and didn't look back.  I'm calling BS to that whole "face your fears" adage.

   
     So what happened?  Well tonight while I was just running along, pushing Monkey in her stroller, about to complete my third mile when I happened to glance down, and out of the corner of my eye I saw a stick.  Keep in mind I don't have contacts anymore; I lost my last one.  So now I'm sporting glasses, and my peripheral vision is pretty much non-existent.  So all I saw when I glanced down was a stick.  A squiggly stick.  And I thought to myself, "I probably shouldn't run over this stick because Monkey was already complaining about too many bumps earlier".  So I swerved, barely missing the squiggly stick with the front tire of my jogging stroller by about 2 inches, and that's when my "squiggly stick" reared back and hissed at me!  Immediately I took off running at a pace I haven't managed in months, and in my mind all I could think was, "HOLY SHIT!  Holy Shit! That was a snake!  Not a stick!  A snake!  OMG!  We almost died!  I almost died because of a stupid squiggly stick that was really a snake!!!  Holy CRAP!  Is he chasing me?  I'm pretty sure he's chasing me!   OMG! I'm being chase by a squiggly, hissing stick!!!  Is this what adrenaline feels like?  So, right now my adrenal medulla is secreting epinephrine and norepinephrine, and that's what's causing the increased BP and increased heart rate, and this is what it feels like?  This is so cool. "  Then the panicked side came back.  "OMG! You nerd! Stop reviewing what you learned in Anatomy and RUN!!  Knees up.  Knees up! Knees UP!!!  OMG!  Why am I cold?  It's 100+ degrees out here, and I'm cold.  Oh, cool so is this what they mean by you have ice in your veins?  Omg!  If you don't shut up nerd and get your knees up that snake is going to get us!  CURSE YOU DEMON SNAKE!!!"

     Needles to say I didn't stop running until I made it safely back to the sidewalks next to my subdivision.  Even then, my eyes were still darting from side to side, scanning for the demon spawn of Hell.  Being on the sidewalk was little comfort, considering my little run-in didn't happen in the woods or when I was running through the recently torn down subdivision where the grass is unruly and hasn't been cut in a month.  Where did all this encounter take place, you ask?  On the newly paved asphalt sidewalk they created specifically for runners, the one that is near the woods, yes, but they mow it and trim it at least once a week.  That's where Mr. Demon snake decided to hang out.  With half his body on the sidewalk someone had just run past!  So that whole "they're more afraid of you than you are of them?"  Yeah, I'm calling bullshit on that one too!

Dear Reader,
    The Bored Navy Wife is currently suffering from a mental breakdown after our little adventure this evening, so she's going to go lie down now.  In a nice dark room.  Under some covers.  For a week.  In the meantime, I think it's safe to say that you won't have to suffer through another annoying attempt at a "motivational" blog about running for a long time.  You're welcome.

Sincerely,
The Demon Snake
aka "The Squiggly Stick"

P.S.  Here's a recipe:


Remember when I went back to the Eubanks Farm in Lucedale?  Well I got some yummy summer crops, and I'd like to share a few of the things I did with them.

First I sliced and pickled the jalapeños, using the same recipe I did when I pickled banana peppers.

 Next, using the Ball Blue Book Guide to Preserving, I made Canned Tomatoes. *I don't have a formal ingredients list for this.  Because I was working in such small batch to save space, I lost count of how much I used.*

Start by gathering your jars (I used pint-sized).  Wash and dry them.  Heat jars and lids and lids in a saucepot of simmering water.  Do not boil lids.  Allow jars and lids to remain in hot water until ready for use, removing one at a time as needed.  (Or to save time and space, run them all through the dishwasher with the steam-dry option.)

Fill water bath canner half-full with hot water.  Elevate rack in canner.  Cover with lid.  Heat water to a simmer.  Keep water hot until used for processing.

Use fresh tomatoes at their peak of quality and flavor.  Use firm tomatoes free of cracks, spots and growths.  Prepare only enough for one canner lad at a time.  Wash tomatoes; drain.

Bring a large pot of water to boil, and have a large bowl of ice water ready.  Add tomatoes to boiling water, and blanch 30-60 seconds, or until skins start to crack.  Remove from boiling water and dip immediately into ice water.

Slip off the skins; trim away any green areas, and cut out core.  Leave tomatoes whole or cute into halves or quarters.

Place tomatoes in a large saucepot, adding just enough water to to cover.  Boil gently 5 minutes.

Begin removing canning jars from hot water (or dishwasher), set jar on towel-lined counter.  Add 1/4 tsp citric acid or 1 TBS lemon juice to each pint jar. (If using quart jars, simply double the amounts).

Carefully pack tomatoes into hot jars, leaving 1/2 inch headspace.  Ladle boiling water (leftover from when you boiled the tomatoes) over the tomatoes.  Add 1/2 tsp salt to each pint jar (again, double for quart jars), if desired.

Slide a nonmetallic spatula between tomatoes and jar; press back gently on tomatoes to release trapped air bubbles.  Repeat procedure 2-3 times around inside of jar.

Wipe rim and threads of jar with a clean, damp cloth.  Remove lid from the hot water (or dishwasher).  Place lid on jar, and screw the band down evenly, just until resistance is met.  "Fingertip tight".

Set all the full jars onto the elevated rack in the water bath canner.  Lower the rack in canner.  Water level must cover the lids on the jars by 1-2 inches.  Add boiling water if necessary.  Put lid on canner.  Bring water to boil.  Process pint jars for 40 minutes (quart jars for 45 minutes).

When time's up turn off heat, remove lid.  Let canner cool 5 minutes, then remove jars and place on a dry towel to cool, about 1-2 inches apart.  Let cool 12-24 hours.  Check seal by pressing on the cent of each lid and listening for the "pop".  If not sealed properly reprocess the can.  Store jars in a cool, dry place.




After that, I made Tomato Sauce, again using the Ball Blue Book.

To make 14 pints or 7 quarts, you'll need:
45 lbs tomatoes
Ball Citric Acid or lemon juice

Wash tomatoes; drain.  Remove core and blossom ends.  Cut into quarters; simmer 20 minutes in a large sauce pot, stirring occasionally.  Puree tomatoes in a food processor.  Strain puree to remove seeds and peels.  Cook pulp in a large, uncovered sauce pot over medium-high heat until sauce thickens, stirring to prevent sticking.

 Reduce volume by 1/2.  Add 1/4 tsp citric acid or 1 TBS lemon juice to each pint jar (double for quart jars).  Ladle hot sauce into hot jars, leaving 1/2 inch headspace.  Adjust two-piece lids. Process pints 35 minutes in water bath (quarts 40 minutes).

Ta-da!

And because Monkey has been on a Lilo and Stitch kick lately, I couldn't help but think of this clip tonight.

It's Summertime

     I don't know what it is, but I can't seem to shake this summer-time laziness that has settled inside me.  Even though I'm taking classes this semester, I'm not motivated for much of anything lately.  I think it's the heat.  At any rate, I've been treating my poor blog as the red-haired step-child again, which I'm trying to amend.  So here I go with a couple of recipes I've been wanting to share.

    A couple of weeks ago, J, Monkey, and I went inland a ways to a farm near Lucedale where you can get a 5 gallon bucket of pick-your-own veggies for $10.  We had so much fun collecting our produce, and we came back with quite the haul.  I was a little overwhelmed when I realized exactly how much chopping, freezing, canning and pickling was in my future, but I enjoyed it so much I'm getting ready to do it again this weekend.

   The first thing I tried was pickled okra.  This is a recipe a friend of mine sent me.  I was super excited to give it a whirl because pickled okra is one of my vices.  It was hard waiting the two weeks after canning to let them have time to cure, but it was well worth it. So here is the recipe from my friend, Theresa:

Pickled Okra:

1 1/2 pounds of fresh okra (3 1/2 to 4 inches long)
4 large garlic cloves, peeled
2 cups cider vinegar (5% acidity)
2 cups water
3 Tbsp kosher salt (Make sure to use canning salt)
1 Tbsp sugar
Pickling spices:

2 Tbsp mustard seeds
1 Tbsp coriander seeds
1 tablespoon red pepper flakes
1 teaspoon fennel seeds
1 teaspoon celery seeds
1 teaspoon black peppercorns

Place vinegar, water, salt, and sugar in a medium saucepan, bring to a boil to dissolve the salt and sugar, reduce heat and keep warm

While the water is heating in step one, prepare the okra and the spices. Rinse the okra and trim the stem ends to 1/4-inch.

Place all pickling spices in a small bowl and stir to combine.

Lay out a clean towel on your counter. Use canning tongs to remove the jars from the boiling water, emptying the water from the jars. Place the hot, sterilized jars on the towel on your counter. Placing the hot jars on a towel will help prevent them from getting shocked by a cold counter surface and potentially cracking. Place a lemon slice at the bottom of each jar. Add a tablespoon of the mixed pickling spices to each jar. Place a peeled garlic clove in each jar.

Pack the okra in the jars, alternating stem-side-up and stem-side-down to allow you to pack the okra well into the jars. The top of the okra should come between an inch to 1/2 an inch from the rim of the jar   This was the first time I've tried my hand at canning anything, and I was please with the results.  

Pour the hot vinegar mixture over the jars, up to 1/4-inch from the rim of the jars. Run a thin knife between the okra and the jars to dislodge any obvious air bubbles. Okra is filled with air, so while you run the knife between the okra and the jars, air bubbles will be released from within the okra as well. If the top level of the pickling liquid lowers while you do this, just top off with more of the pickling liquid. If for any reason you don't have enough pickling liquid for all the jars, just add equal amounts of cider vinegar and water. No need to heat first, the liquid will get boiled in the hot water bath.

Place packed jars back in the pot with water you used to sterilize the jars. The water should still be hot. Because you are putting back in full jars, rather than empty jars, some water will be displaced. Allow for 1 to 2 inches of water to cover the jars. Beyond that you may want to remove excess water. Bring to a boil and process for 15 minutes. Remove to towel lined counter or to a rack.  Let cure for a week before opening and eating.

     I had so much fun with the first attempt I quickly began working on pickling the enormous banana peppers Monkey had picked with such gusto.  

Where's the banana in this pepper?

 Pickled Banana Peppers from The Canning Granny

5 cups white vinegar

1 cup water

4 tsp Canning and Pickling salt

4 TBS sugar

2-4 cloves garlic 

2-3 lbs peppers (I used banana with a couple of cayenne for extra spice)

Cut the stems off the peppers, remove seeds (without cutting into the pepper so you can still have pretty rings).  Slice peppers into rings.  

Prepare brine by mixing vinegar, water, salt, sugar, and garlic.  Bring to a boil.  Reduce heat; simmer 10-15 minutes. 

Meanwhile, boil 3-4 pint jars in large canning pot.  Boil lids and rings in a separate, smaller pot.    When ready to use remove the jars from the water, and place on a counter lined with a clean dish towel.  

Pack jars with sliced peppers.  Remove garlic cloves from brine, and pour brine into packed jars.  Slide a thin knife around the edge of jar to remove excess air bubbles.  Make sure you have about 1/2" space between top of jar and liquid level.  Wipe rims.  Screw lids on jars, and place back in large pot you boiled them in.  Return to boil.  Boil 10 minutes.  

After processing, carefully remove from pot and set on towel.  Listen for the "ping" to signal they've sealed.  Check all seals before storing. If any didn't seal, reprocess in boiling water bath.  

Let sit 2 weeks before eating.  

*UPDATE:

Tonight I also made Pickled Jalapeños, using the same recipe, and they are excellent!

     After seeing all the work I was putting into preseving all our extra produce, J has decided that I'd earn my keep in the event of a zombie apocalypse.  Because, you know, I hadn't proved that with my ability to cook things from scratch and run three miles in under 30 minutes.  Good to know he'll keep me around....

Happy Anniversary, Baby!

   Four years ago today I married the man I loved.  Although my love for him then was as fierce as I could manage, it's a mere shadow of what I feel for him today.  After four years of marriage, not only is he the man I love above all others; he's the man I share a life with, a home with, a child with, and a story with.  He's the first one I want to call when I have some funny story to tell.  He's the first one I run to when there's a crisis.  He's the one that can make me smile, make me laugh, and bring me to tears with just a look.  Even when he's far away, he's still the voice in my head encouraging me to be a better me, to go after that goal, and to believe in myself.  I am so grateful for these past four years, and I can't wait to see what the next 50-60 hold.

    In addition to our anniversary today, Monday is J's birthday, so I wanted to make sure I sent off a care package with enough goodies to spoil him for both occasions.  That's why I was so excited when I found Cake in a Jar!

All you need is 4 Pint-sized jars and the cake mix of your choice.  Prepare your cake batter.  Spray the inside of your jars with cooking spray.  Then fill the jars up about 3/4 of the way with the batter.  Place them on a cookie sheet and bake for the time required in your recipe, or until a toothpick inserted into the middle of the cake comes away clean.  (You may have to adjust the time slightly.)  When it's cooked, remove from oven and carefully screw the tops on tightly.  You'll hear them pop as they seal.  Voila!  Cake in a Jar lasts up to 6 months!  I sent 4 jars of red velvet cake to my hubby with a can of store-bought cream cheese icing.  He can either share or hoard them for later :-)

   In his care package I also included a little photo collage Monkey put together:

And I packed a bag of my Homemade Granola in there along with a few essentials such as razors, vitamins, etc.  I haven't heard whether or not he's received it, but considering I sent it at the end of July, here's hoping.